perpetual waiting

Perpetual Anticipation, Endlessly Waiting

When will the coronavirus end? When will the economy reopen? When will my license to practice finally clear? When will school finally be over forever? When will get paid? When will I get my disability check? We have been conditioned to be forever in pursuit of something more, something new, something different, something exciting. We have completely lost touch with the present moment. Therefore, we have completely lost touch with inner peace and satisfaction.

Concentrating on the future builds fear, anxiety, and anger. Focusing on the past can bring happiness but also longing and despair and resentment for what is lost. Focusing intently on this present moment is the only means by which to gain your freedom from the perceived horrors of what is to come and the sense of loss for that which has passed.

We must fill our minds with the here and now. The sound of the birds, the wind in the trees, the skyline. The details. It is impossible to succeed when we “try not to think about it”, the space in our minds must always be occupied by something so we need to practice filling this space with peaceful, present awareness of what is happening around us at any given moment.

We must intentionally occupy all the space in our heads (and hearts) with intense attention on the details of the here and now, thereby forcing all of the yesterdays and tomorrows out of our headspace and feeling completely satisfied with this present second of this present day.

This is not to say that we should abandon all our responsibilities and pursuits, but rather to pay attention to what we are responsible for in this current minute, one minute at a time. Never what we are responsible for in the days, weeks, months, or years to come. The bigger picture was always designed to be overwhelming for the human heart and mind to process. Trying to process all of what is to come is equivalent to marching an army of then thousand, shoulder to shoulder across a rope bridge. Tomorrow will arrive, whether we worry and fret or not. We can ruin the current moment forever by remaining intently focused on the future or we may enjoy our lives one moment at a time.

“May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock, and my Redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14)

“May my meditation be pleasing to him, as I rejoice in the LORD.” (Psalm 104:34)